I'm trying to decide today if I want to see about getting in for a haircut. About 2 months ago I got a haircut that I really haven't liked but the super short layers (that made me feel like I had a mullet going on) are finally growing out and I'm just not sure...I've wanted to go back to having a bob, whether I go for a lob, inverted, or asymmetrical (although that would require a lot of maintenance) one, and if I just let this bad past haircut keep growing out I might just chicken-out of going back to a shorter overall length like I had a few years ago. Decisions decisions...
My best childhood friend moved to Fernie, BC a couple of years ago with her husband and baby boy. Her husband was having a hard time finding a job that paid well enough here, so they decided to pack up and go where the work was, make a good chunk of cash and come back later on. It's been almost two years ago since they left and I've been able to see SarBear twice (one day each visit). They couldn't make it to my wedding last year and it felt really strange not having her there with me on such a meaningful day, though I understood the circumstances of course. Just before Christmas we were talking over facebook messanger and she said they're thinking of moving back in a year, two years tops. Apparently they've found it really difficult to get to know people and make friends up there in Fernie, and it gets pretty lonely. She's only told a few people who are close to them so far, and I can't wait for her to move back.
On the side of my writing-desk I also have the obituary of a friend/coworker who passed away almost two years ago. She was just 21 when she passed away, and it was pretty devastating. We worked together on Mothers Day, and after we were done cleaning up the restaurant we sat outside the kitchen doors and each had a smoke (I'm not a smoker, I just used to have an occasional social cigarette a couple times a year when I was younger). She said she'd just had her tea leaves read and the woman had told her her feet still had so many places to go to. She said she'd been having a hard time, just feeling down and a lot of anxiety, and she was looking forward to moving away to work in this tiny town where she wouldn't be as likely to spend money flippantly, and then go to school for welding. There were a couple of strange things I happened to say in the last hour or two that we were there at the restaurant, without thinking: firstly, I referred to her a "LaLa" (which I had never done during the 2.5 years we'd known each other) and she stopped in her tracks and said "that's what my little sister used to call me", to which I shrugged and said "yeah, I don't know where that came from." The strangest thing was that I was so overwhelmingly anxious and emotional about her leaving, and I really wanted to extend the clean-up process so that we wouldn't be ready to leave so soon. Nimo, the sister of our boss who used to work in the kitchen (who is a super amazing woman from India, and really inspiring and super caring), was crying and Laura kept telling her that it would be okay because she'd come back during her winter break from school to help out with the Christmas parties. I looked her right in the eyes and said "this isn't goodbye forever," even though I had this feeling of dread. So of course, when we found out a few days later that she'd slipped and fell into a river the day after she'd moved and drowned, I felt horrible on so many levels.
The strangest thing was the week after she'd passed I'd had a very vivid dream in which she and I were on the city bus together and I'd asked her if everyone else could see her. She told me that only some people could see her, most of them couldn't, and I told her that I didn't ever want to stop being able to see her, at which point I woke up.
Her family's cocker spaniel is still listed in our client files at my current job, even though they haven't been in at all since I started there, months before Laura's death (I waitressed part-time for the first 3 months of working in the salon before I got sent to grooming academy). I have to scroll past their file fairly often because it's one of a hundred dogs named Molly in our computer system, and part of me always holds my breath. The computer system often randomly deletes files if a client hasn't been in in the last year, so it's a bit odd that they're even still listed there. She really loved her parent's dog.
How I got from talking about my best friend to talking about my dead friend is kind of awkward...uh, I'm not sure how that happened...
Back on a TTC note, my BBT is still high, but it's fallen another 0.1 degree today. So it appears it's making a very gradual fall as I get closer to AF arriving. 8DPO and no symptoms other than this continual feeling of being dehydrated. I think I'm needing to pee more but only because of how much damn water I'm guzzling every chance I get. One of my two Internet Angels Lkal just had AF arrive after her first IUI, which is a bummer too. Hopefully we'll get our BFPs someday soon though.
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